arun in brooklyn

soumya says that it’s more than a little unnerving that i can disappear from people’s lives for months at a time…i’ve never really spent too much time thinking about this…more than anything, i’ve found that for the vast majority of my friends, we can pick up exactly where we left off…weeks, months, a year…whatever…i’ve always come to view this as a type of special relationship i have with people…that you can just let time pass by without any disruption of the actual relationship…

oddly enough, i find very often that i need to remove myself from social interaction pretty regularly from time to time in order to maintain some level of sanity…having been socially anxious for so long, ive come to enjoy time by myself…withdrawing myself from the world can be a really peaceful and necessary activity in my life…but i never really considered the ramifications of this on my numerous friends…especially the ones that are new in my life and haven’t known me for years and years…

i tell soumya that i’m sorry for my sudden departure this summer…but that it will likely happen again…and that i can’t or am unwilling to fix that part of me right now…i don’t know how i feel about any of that…but lately i’ve been taking as much solace in just being upfront and honest about what i can and can’t do with my friends…and hoping they’ll just put up with me the best they can…after all, what are friends for…

peace etc.

ooxx aa